But being a mom in real life wasn't even on my mind. Maybe because I had a baby sister at 13.
But never a mom in real life.
God gave me three babies by the time I was 23...one month before turning 24.
Surprisingly, I never received a manual on how to raise them. So we headed full force into parenting with nothing...not even a helmet.
Eventually, the tantrums came, the potty training was easier with each child, and I began to craft plans for what I wanted them to know, learn, practice in life. As they grew, I grew. God showing me, guiding me, and protecting me as their mother...and most of all, blessing me.
My 40th birthday came with a world wind, and I covered most of it in a blog yesterday, but there were a few things my children gifted me that I can not miss an opportunity to journal in this dairy of mine.
The middle girl has dealt with fear and anxiety most of her life. I always have said if I die you better send Mallory on with me because she will not make it without me. With this preface, she burst through my bedroom door the morning of my birthday, waking Jason and I, and said, "Happy Birthday, mom! I have worried about this day my entire life; the day you got old. I always thought 40 was the day someone turned old, and then you would be close to dying, and I would do the math to see how old I would be on this day and I knew I would be 17, so I would tell myself that surely I would be old enough to handle the day you got old. But here we are, on the day I've dreaded my entire life and you not even old at all!"
I'm not exaggerating! At! All!
Later that day she had sweet words to boast on my facebook page. She's the funniest...I adore her wittiness, her boldness, her fabulous memory, and her ability to overcome! She's never failed to tell me when she's aggravated with me, but always reminds me how much she needs me and loves me!
The eldest daughter, who never speaks aloud, however, we learned she raps but we've rarely heard her speak, blessed my soul on the day I "got old." She was away at school but found time to write me a sweet birthday sentiment. My heart gushed...She's never really told me what she thought about my parenting style, skill (or lack thereof), and example for her. It's that precious moment when your children grow up and start becoming your friend, and with maturity begin to speak into your life the way you've always tried to speak into theirs.
The boy laid down beside me and hugged my face, telling me happy birthday, and how much he loved me. He texted me later in the evening to ask me if I were having fun. How telling that he cares if I am enjoying my time away. This boy...THE Boy...my boy.
I'm not sure I would have chosen to even have children, but I am so thankful that His ways are higher than mine. They saved my life, and now they bless me daily.
The husband spent time creating a box of memories for me. There were several cd's full of music that mean something to he and I, movies, and other objects that only he and I understand the meanings behind. But he created a binder for me full of photos, memories, and a letter he wrote me - which are my favorite - words are my favorite!
In other Thomas family business:
This how the eldest girl and I communicate:
I accidentally sent her a text message meant for the husband. I'm still belly laughing!